…until I move back to Sweden. It is a bitter-sweetness about leaving Oxford and all the people here but also getting to go home to Sweden and all the people there.
I have now just enjoyed life, nature and the free time this week. I needed to rest, sleep and do things that I wanted to, when I wanted to. Spontaneously living for a week! So I have spend most time with some friends and then out in parks soaking in the summer sun. Have eaten pancakes two days, Atomic Pizza one day and then spent a lot of time reading fiction literature instead of the school work I spend more of my time with the last months.
Pictures will come later, some problems with uploading at the moment.
Finally all deadlines are done and the exam is written. I have partied this weekend and said good bye to the first people that left UK now. It was sad but I’m okay. Then I have sleept as well and today I start to feel like a human again!
Sun is shining and the warmth is here now, which means that summer has come! Perfect timing for me!
I now have two weeks just to enjoy the city of Oxford and the friends who still are here. I will go one day to London and do some more turist things, eat food and do a tiny amount of shopping, maybe. haha.
Other than that, I will take some time to post what I been doing the last month over here so you all will get an update. Even though I spent most time in the library or my room, I still have left it every now and then to not go mad. So I have done somethings that I can share with you guys. Just be patient for the next coming days.
Everything that is very typical for UK in one picture, Red bus, Westminster Abbey, Big Ben, London Eye, Phone booth and a cab. haha Perfect! We went here the days just after the attack against Westminster. It was a tension in the air and many were silent in the area. It was very moving and hit me straight in the heart, feelings was felt. It was powerful to be there.
Of course we had to do the Big Ben picture, you never know when you might come there the next time.
Some beers and wine to reload in a classic English Pub.
Horse guards!! And oh that look for the man! haha Such a beautiful place and we were so lucky with the weather of the day.
So as you can see from the title this will be about Cola, I will not tell anyone not to drink it or anything like that. I will only tell you Why I won’t be drinking it any more.
Today I had a can of Cola, regular. This will be the last drop of cola I will ever drink. The list to why I made this decision can be long and of course it is not healthy for anyone to drink it, but that’s up to everyone if you do or not. Now a day’s most people are aware that Cola has a lot of suger in it anyway and videos of boiling it has gone around the internet.
My biggest reason for this decision is because of anxiety.
I hadn’t had a Cola in two weeks before today, due to the fact that I hadn’t felt like having one, but today I though it would taste good so why not get one. I should not have done that. Just 20 min after finishing it I started to feel warm and my heart started to accelerate, thinking ‘oh no I hope I’m not getting sick’. Though I quickly figure out it is anxiety that I am feeling due to the suger and caffeine in the Cola.
To have anxiety is a part of my everyday life now, I have learnt how to live with it and not letting it stop me from doing the things I want to do. But it is still the WORST feeling ever, you have no control over it once it has started to take over your body and mind, you just have to wait it out. Sure I have my tricks today to help it pass faster and so but getting anxiety from suger and caffeine is something else. That is a physic reaction in the body and not in your mind, you have no control over that, you just have to wait it out. Sitting and waiting, feeling how your heart is beating hard out of your chest, getting warm and sweaty as this all makes you feel nausea, knowing no tricks will help it.
It is a horrible feeling, that I am well aware of.
Though not until today had I figured it was because of Cola that I had felt this way every now and then. I have been giving myself anxiety for years, just by drinking Cola. This is why I will stop today, I will never have another Cola in my life. I can not continue to do this to me now when I finally figured out one thing that gives me this feeling, and it is not in my mind.
Why do something when you know it makes you feel bad?
I chose Peace of my Mind before a can of Cola from now on!
So the first full they in London with mom and Eva we started by going to Hyde Park and just soak in the nature, sun and springfeelings that was in the air. It was so beautiful with all the flowers blooming and the many birds that lives in the park, being out and showing them self off almost. It was just so lovely ^^
The statues of Peter Pan and his lost boys.
Looking right at me…
Wild parakeets, probably placed there but it was cool to see.
I have the last couple of days been in London and met up with my mom and my sort of aunt, not married in to the family, no blood line either but she has been a part of the family for as long as I can remember. She is one of my moms oldest friends and so she is now a part of the family haha. I need to stop rambling on, haha.
We all got there on Friday but they arrived a bit before me, so when I finally got there we had lots of hugs and a little tears was seen. We went to a cozy restaurant named Cotê Brasserie, which has become to be one of my favorite places here in UK. They have a gluten free meny and are so professionell about allergies, which I love. I have always felt so comfortable going there, and being sure that I will not get sick by eating there. And that it is heavenly delicious is the biggest bonus of them all, the food is so good!
Ofc we started with bubbles ^^
I had for main course Beef Bourguignon which was so amazingly good and for dessert I had a Creme Brulee.
Aunt Eva had same as me for main and for dessert she had Chocolate Fondant, which she loved!
Mom had Lamb with rosemary and garlic for main and Chocolate Mousse for dessert which she was very pleased with.
Me and mom <3
I have so many pictures and we did so many things these days that I will split it into many smaller posts through out this week. So bear with me and you shall see all the things we experienced, eat and did.
In the beginning of this month, me and some friends spent a day in the city center going to a food market, rowing match and the movie Logan. Just having a chill day, and I am so glad I got to join cus’ it ended being such energy boost, kind of day!
Of course the sky opened up and dropped a super heavy rain when it was time for the one person we were there to see do her rowing match of the day.
It was such a nice day, even though we got a bit of rain, we had most sunshine. It was a sweet day with great company. Thank you guys ^^
It is now at the middle of semester and the busies weeks has begun. It is panic, anxiety and the best time ever at the same time, It is true love and hate, but I will survive. Especially after yesterday when I got back a paper with the grade of A on it. I am soaring above the ground up in the sky among the clouds from the happiness and study boost I got from this. Yaay!
Soon it is weekend and tonight I will be going out with some Swedish friends that I met over here, food and drinks is what to expect. Celebration both my A and that is it St. Patrick’s day today, but also that we all met each other and just enjoy the evening. Other then that, my weekend contains of studying, keeping up the hard work and hope for more good grades.
Next week will be so lovely and amazing, starting with Amanda, also from Sweden, who was here last semester is coming back to visit and staying at my place for two night so it will be so much fun and wonderful to see her again! After that my mum and aunt (sort of) is coming to visit over the weekend and a bit more, we will met up in London. It will be so wonderful to have them here for five days, just to see them cus’ I miss home so much at this point. We will stay at a hotel, eat good food, drink nice drinks and do a lot of sightseeing as well. Planing to go to Camden Market, Westminister, Big Ben, Piccadilly, Oxford Street, Hyde Park and also seeing a rowing race on the Themes. So each day will need some planing to have time for it all. But I can’t wait, I am so excited.
Sadly there are some people who will not come to visit me, and that is sad. Some people have been saying they will most certain come and visit me, even if just for a couple of days. Though some have not even contacted me, to check my availability, so I know they will not come at all. I do not like people who say one thing and do another. That is not okey, and I build up hope about seeing some, then they don’t even text or talk to me for so long. Some people make an effort to keep in contact while some only talks to you when they want something from you. I am trying not to give it to much energy but that is easier said then do some days, with someones.